No Shirt, No Shoes, No Service
by Sofa King Stupid
Summary: A collection of Derek and Sam and their life together, with everything from romance to angst to humor. Derek/Sam, rating for safety.
1. Goldfish

**Title: **No Shirt, No Shoes, No Service

**Chapter:** Goldfish

**Word Count: **1322

I found a prompt table and wrote one sentence for every word- it took a lot longer than I thought it would, but it was fun and I hope you enjoy it. There is a spoiler for Of Mice And Men in #12, and if anyone's interested, the dog that I mention is a Tibetan Mastiff.

I will take requests for drabbles, one shots, or sentences, so if you review here with a prompt I will do my best to write it, and it'll be posted as an additional chapter here. Or if you don't understand a sentence or want to know what I was high on while I wrote this or anything, well, review and ask me. :)

**Disclaimer: **Life With Derek belongs to people other than me.

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First Kiss

The love in their first kiss was overshadowed by their fear of being caught, and that was the saddest thing of all.

Final

"Uhm, well, we've been together for four years now and, uhm, I was- you know I love you, right?, I love you, I really do, and I was wondering, if maybe, if you weren't too busy, could you, would- I mean to say- will you please marry me?"

Numb

Sam's leg had fallen asleep, but the thought of disturbing Derek from his peaceful sleep was so awful that he forced himself to grin and bear it… at least for a few more minutes.

Broken Wings

Derek studied his bruised face in the mirror, his broken arm cradled gently, and thought that though being attacked by people he used to call friends hurt, he would take a hundred beatings if it meant that his father might notice him.

Melody

Sam swallowed nervously, "Derek?, I… I love… your laugh," he chickened out, but quickly elaborated at Derek's questioning look, "Yeah, I think it's very pretty and… lovely and I like it very much."

Rules

Laughing, they ran through the store, their bare feet making a soft smacking noise against the tile; the first in a long line of rules that they would break, together.

Chocolate

Derek leaned closer and allowed the chocolate smudge to be licked off his nose.

Nostalgia

"What about us?" Casey asked finally, her voice trembling slightly, to which Sam shrugged and replied, "It wasn't about us before, and it's not about us now- it's just you."

Heartbeat

He knew it was kind of cliché, but there were very few things that he enjoyed more than curling up together and listening to the rhythmic sound of his boyfriend's heartbeat.

Stranger

Thinking back on Derek's revelation, George wondered if they'd grown apart, or if he'd ever really known his son at all.

Confusion

Kendra was pretty, popular and perfect for him- so why did he feel so empty when he kissed her?

Bitter

Derek looked at the book in Marti's hand, "Mice and Men- that's a good book," he paused, contemplating, then added, "George kills Lennie," and walked out the door.

Afterlife

"I don't care what happens when we die, as long as I'm with you," Sam said, and Derek rolled his eyes, "Wow, way to be a girl."

Daybreak

Derek had never properly seen a sunrise, and watching the sky change colors and paint the city in red, he figured this was because he'd never had Sam to watch it with.

Audience

He'd never admit it, but sometimes when the house was empty he'd turn the tv onto sports, cover the screen and pretend that they were all cheering for him.

Endless Sorrow

He watched the lone goldfish swim aimlessly in it's tank and pressed his cheek up to the glass, "I know how you feel."

Fireworks

"I like the whistley ones the best," Derek stated, and for the life of him Sam couldn't think of anything to say to that.

Wishing

Sam scrunched his nose up, "I wish you'd chew with your mouth shut."

Happy Birthday To You

It was earlier than he usually woke up, but as Sam snuck back into their bedroom with the puppy in his arms, he thought that just this once, Derek wouldn't mind.

Tomorrow

His family would probably never speak to him again, if he went through with this, but Derek would take Sam over them any day.

Oppression

He looked up from his computer in time to see Casey get into her limo, and figured that the Prom was overrated anyway.

Agony

"Oh my god, I've got a sliver the size of the Space Needle!"

Return

When the Christmas presents he'd sent were returned unopened, again, Derek went back on his promise to himself and cried.

Protection

"What, you worried I'll get pregnant?" Derek snickered.

Boxes

Derek set down the last box, smiled, then frowned, "Wait… we don't have to unpack them too, do we?"

Hope

Sam didn't think he'd ever felt like this in his life, but as he fumbled desperately with the button on his pants, he was comforted by the fact that Derek felt the exact same way.

Preparation

They sat on the floor, silently staring at their freshly bought gallon of pink paint, and fell that much further in love.

Beautiful

He smiled down at their baby and cooed, "Aww, Der, she has your eyes," and that moment would go down in history as the first and last time that Derek didn't tell Sam how stupid his comment was.

Lies

"Um, no, our tv's always been that big."

Underneath

"Underneath your cocky, cranky, mean spirited exterior, I know that there's a soft, cuddly person just begging to get out," he recited, causing his mother to roll her eyes and reply, "Sam, dear, maybe it's not the best idea for you to write your own vows."

Hide

Sam scratched his head in faux bewilderment as a small, dark eyed child poorly concealed her giggles and pulled the blanket closer over her head.

Diary

He shook his head, "No way, diaries lead to secrets which lead to cutting which lead to suicide, and I will _not _have my baby jumping in front of cars."

Unforeseen

Watching Derek hold her, tiny hands pressed against his, Sam wished that everyone from home- everyone who swore that it wouldn't last- could see them now.

Conditional

When her favorite necklace showed up a few days later out in the yard, she screamed and stormed off, to which he scratched the dog's head fondly and shouted after her, "It's nothing a little soap and hot water won't fix!"

Gone

"Dad, why don't you have any family?" She asked innocently, and pouted for a day when he refused to answer her.

Clear Skies

Derek looked forlornly from his brand new surfboard to the oncoming hurricane and sighed- it was going to be _that_ kind of summer.

Heartache

"You wouldn't understand," she cried, pulling away from her parents even as they tried to comfort her, "you've never had a boyfrie- oh, wait."

Wired

Sam fidgeted under Derek's accusing glare, as upstairs a little girl loudly and destructively worked off the energy from her sugar rush.

Insanity

She rode into the house bareback, her muddy hands clutching at the thick fur and kicking his big sides and god bless him, the mastiff took it like a man.

Foolish

Derek rolled his eyes, "Sam, don't be such a _blonde_."

Words

"Daaa?" She giggled, and seeing Derek's face light up, Sam couldn't bring himself to insist that she was talking to him.

Study

His finger lazily traced each of Derek's laugh lines, committing each to memory, and he couldn't help but wonder exactly when they'd started getting old.

Punctual

She burst into the house one minute before eleven, chirping something about a boy she'd met at the mall, and he decided that nature must trump nurture because God knew _they'd_ never been able to make curfew.

Piggybank

She shook her new piggybank delightedly, listening to the sound of the coins inside it, and Derek grinned, "Get used to saving, dear, because we're not going to be young forever and we're counting on you to pay our way into a nursing home."

Shooting Star

Sam wrapped his arm around Derek hesitantly, surprised when the other boy leaned into him, and he really wasn't sure if it was okay for him to have these sorts of feelings, but then Derek looked up at him and the stars were so beautiful and the moment was right, and what was the worst that could happen?


	2. Sweet Tooth

**Title: **No Shirt, No Shoes, No Service

**Chapter:** Sweet Tooth

**Word Count: **185

15 sentences of dialogue, each written around a one word prompt. Unless otherwise stated, everything in the No Shirt, No Shoes, No Service collection will be happening at some point in a single alternate universe- so you won't, say, see a one shot where they have a son.

Have any questions about anything I've written, or want to request a piece? Review! I'm going to try and post something every day, and I need to stay stocked with prompts. :)

**Disclaimer: **Life With Derek belongs to people other than me.

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Defiant

"Hey Sam, my family's away for the weekend- wanna come over and do it in my dad's bed?"

Grateful

"Thanksgiving is celebrated because… errm, Indians and… uhm, Lincoln?, you know what, just shut up and eat your turkey."

Decent

"No offense, Der, but you're kind of a lousy person."

Go

"Please, just… go."

Shame

"I'll leave if you want me too, Dad, but it won't change anything and you know it."

Objective

"I swear, if this agency keeps denying us I'll just steal a kid."

Sweeten

"Whipped cream makes _everything_ better."

Hands

"You have girl hands, but in a good way."

Whispered

"Our wedding was sooo much more fun than this one."

Free

"I don't care how much we're 'saving,' we are _not_ getting another dog."

Dirty

"You've been a bad boy, Sammy."

Shining

"Damn Cali sun- why couldn't we have moved to Washington or something?"

Overflow

"I like ice cream as much as anyone else, but don't you think 20 gallons at once is a _little_ excessive?"

Shadows

"Daddy, there's something under my bed… can I sleep with you?"

Obvious

"I love you."


End file.
